Thursday, April 23, 2009

Marsey-doats and Doesey-dotes

What's up, blogpies? (See Alexa, it's like groupies but for the BLOG!! Get it? Huh? Huh?)

*listens to the crickets chirp*

I understand that some of you might not get that joke, and that's okay. It's like a secret club that speaks in some sort of crazy moon code like those sillies in the Dr. Scholls commercials.

Are you gellin'?

Instead, it's blogging.

Are you bloggin'? I'm bloggin' while I'm joggin'.
(cuts to an S&M fanatic)
I'm bloggin' and I'm floggin'... *whip cracks*
(cue lumberjacks)
We're bloggin' when we're loggin'!

Had enough? I thought so. You get the idea. No, I did not use a rhyming dictionary. You can't prove that I did. Stop looking up rhyming dictionaries.

There's a question that I really do not like to answer, though I realize that technically you can never be wrong. There is no such thing as stupid questions, people...Just stupid music.

I always cringe when I'm asked "Hey, what do you think this song sounds like?". It gives me the ickies and I don't really know why. I mean, I can pretty much say whatever I want. But it reminds me of some psychological test where you have to point to a picture of a cat, dog or bird when you're asked what fire makes you think of. *

*not a real test

If fire makes you think of cats, you're clearly insane and oh by the way - you should probably run because here come the burly men in white coats to commit your crazy kittycrisp lovin' self.

A slightly worse subquestion is "Who does $BAND sound like?". I stink at that sort of thing, honestly. I will tell you that starting around 4:28 in You Are The Blood covered by Sufjan Stevens sounds like what Enya would sound like if she candy-flipped and DJed at a rave. Starting at 7:40 it kind of sounds like the background music of a Tom and Jerry cartoon. Around 8:01, it starts to sound like Edvard Grieg's Piano Concerto in A minor. (OPUS 16, Y'ALL). 9:17 and on reminds me of something that would be in a Batman movie.

I told you I stink at it, or that I have a VERY odd perception of what things sound like. The next time someone asks me this question, I'm just going to say something random.

Better yet!! I'll use a Chuck Norris fact generator and instead of Chuck Norris, I'll say the name of the artist.

"I don't know, but I heard Colin Meloy once partook in a pissing contest outside of a bar. His opponent drowned."

Yeah. Just like that.